When my surgery was put on the calendar, I FREAKED OUT. I told Danny we were not doing this. It will be impossible. We don't have enough people here. We had barely been in Houston six months. We had been so busy with three kids having three separate surgeries and then me being back and forth from MD Anderson and the holidays and the OH MY GOSH WE JUST MOVED TO HOUSTON, of it all, so we just hadn't spent a significant amount of time with anyone we had met. There had been no time to make people. We have a few family members - my aunt and uncle an hour away and my cousin and her family, both working parents with busy lives of their own. But clearly it was going to be impossible. And then that thing happened. When MY PEOPLE started showing up. Friends and family members started shuffling around their lives and their own busy schedules full of work and families and obligations and they made space for ME on the their calendars. They have showed up for the last five weeks, by airplane, by car - on the wings of angels for all I'm concerned because they have shown up. And the ones that couldn't show up really wanted to and had really BIG reasons why they couldn't because we had just a couple of times frames left to fill and they had things like the IRONMAN race and big attorney case things or things like that during those times. Or logistical problems. But we never even had to fret because my aunt Nancy has willingly driven an hour on many occasions to spend days with us. We have been taken care of so very well. I have another bestie headed our way tomorrow for the entire week. Her husband is working and holding down the fort with two of their kids and their brand new puppy. Amazing. And then the Harmon/Wade clan will be here for the week after that. Every time I think about all that everyone had to do to show up for me, I get choked up.
And like I said - we have had some gaps. A day or two here and there and a lot of the weekends when we are on our own and we're doing just fine. Danny is working his butt off around here and keeping all of our heads above water. But also - something else incredibly beautiful has happened.
To preface - one of the friends we have made, Amy, sent me an e-mail. She said she wanted to help us so she thought she could make a meal planning calendar to set up for our friends to bring us meals. I replied that it was incredibly kind of her but unfortunately, we don't have many friends and we haven't known anyone really long enough to feel comfortable to ask them to cook for us. It was a lovely gesture, but just not feasible. So I thought.
Several days later I received an e-mail from Amy, copied to Hannah, Samantha and Becca, more friends met through Emmie's kindergarten class. Attached to it was a schedule of when they would be bringing dinner. I was speechless. In awe, thinking, they really haven't even known me long enough to "care" about me. Wow.
My super chef brother made lovely meals while he was here, but the minute he left, two of my friends from our cul-de-sac, Lindsay and Melinda, brought dinner (and also again later!) After a couple of weeks of being home and still struggling, I received ANOTHER email from Amy, with two weeks worth of those same FOUR women bringing dinner. Meaning they've cooked for us a minimum of three times a piece. Between the six of these women, whom we have know NOT EVEN A YEAR, we have had home-cooked meals on a consistent basis for four weeks. The food has been wonderful and delicious and much appreciated, but that's not the most astounding part of it. The most astounding part is the beautiful PEOPLE. I have PEOPLE here and I didn't even know it. I hadn't had a chance to get to know them well enough to discover this yet. And though I have not been able to contribute much to these friendships yet, I know that they are my people.
Some people just have it in them. The it cannot be described necessarily but it is felt. It is generosity. Kindness. Selflessness. Compassion. I am quite blessed to have crossed paths with these new people and also am blessed for all the ones I have back home. I have friends who get it. I have these people in my family. In fact, I have a couple, my brother and my aunt Carla, who have it so much, that they have provided meals to my people in Kansas who have had hard times on my behalf because I am in Houston. God bless all of these people that make the world such a better place because they get it.
And let's not forget, this is not only the people who have done things, but the hundreds of people who have said things. People who have read my tiny little blog, and for some reason felt their heart stir and cared enough to write me a message. Or two. Or often. Some of these people I have known a while. Some I have not seen in fifteen or twenty years. Some I have NEVER met. But they have those special kind of hearts that just care about people. They are my reasons for having faith in humanity. They are the bright lights in my day that shine over the dark moments. They are my YELLOW.
So these people...all these people...they get IT. Below is a photo of our family rules. They've been in place for quite a long time, long before the surgery or the move to Houston. One through three will change as the kids grow and mature. Four through six will never change. I will preach these lessons to my children and model them and plant these seeds into their minds in hopes that they will grow to be people who get it. I did not make up these sayings. I am not the mastermind behind all of the assorted wall hangings you can purchase with these quotes on them. I simply believe in them with every fiber of my heart and soul. The it, I'm referring to, is number five.
|It's a bit faded. I need to re-write it, but you |
know, all this recovery and such is getting
in the way of these important things.
And then there's this HUGE profoundness to it. Which is the it that some of the other people get. That "we" is all of us. And we are all meant to take care of each other. All of us. Our neighbors, our community, just...everyone. Black or white, gay or straight, Republican or Democrat, all ethnicities, all religions, those who prefer Coke or those who prefer Pepsi, white bread or wheat bread, green eyes or blue eyes, Royals fan or
So to all of my people, old and new, thank you. Thank you again, because I just can't find ways to thank you enough. And thank you to all the people who get it. You are special. You make the world a better place. I am blessed to have you in my life.
Love you all,